the office has been filled with lots of reflection and heavy hearts since we learned about our manager's dad. they recently discovered that he has terminal cancer and only a few days to live. as of this morning, he is being supported by a respirator, which they will lower in dosage to see if he wakes up so they can ask him if he wants to remain on the respirator, or go home to be with his family during his last moments. all of this started on tuesday and apparently, most of the family have managed to travel from all parts of the country to say their final goodbyes.
on wednesday night, we discussed aging and death in my health class. thoughts of my manager's dad entered my mind and eventually i began thinking about my own parents, both whom have serious health issues and are still in their mid-late 40s. they're both smokers and live an overall unhealthy lifestyle. my dad has high blood pressure, high cholesterol, has had kidney stones, and is on the verge of getting diabetes. my mom has already had a hospital scare about 2 years ago relating to her ovaries. she also recently discovered that she may have liver problems. sigh.
my health professor is always encouraging us to change our lifestyles for the better. the #1 killer in america are lifestyle-related diseases. this country is dying from diabetes, obesity, heart attacks, strokes, and arteriosclerosis, whereas other countries are still dying from malaria, HIV, AIDS, and TB. it makes me really upset that my parents are falling into this statistic and i see the negative effects being passed down to my sisters who have little control over what is being naturally fed to them.
on the other hand, i am forced to remind myself that my parents are suffering from outside forces such as financial burden and stress. they have been struggling, especially because the economy has hit the small-time business owners the hardest. so, realistically, they are just trying to get by with what they have and unfortunately it means affordable, unhealthy meals that can feed a family of 4 and consistent stress that can break the body down.
i can't excuse the personal decisions they make about life, though. one reason i quit smoking cigarettes was in hopes that my mom would follow and that my sisters would not start (which they haven't, thank God). the older i get, the more i'm beginning to realize that maybe there's nothing i can do but love my parents unconditionally. maybe it's time for me to stop the lecturing, the condescending words, and take down the wall and just appreciate the time we still have together because in all truth, guys.. i don't see them living past another 10 years. it's very, very sad and you can see why i get so upset.. but it's also very true and real. but i'm not God. i am just their daughter.
anyway. i didn't mean to put down your Friday, my sincerest apologies if i did. i wanted to share with you what has been weighing heavily on my heart and mind, especially with the recent and unfortunate events going on around here. my boss lives just down the street from me so i'm hoping to stop by tomorrow and offer my condolences with a hug, flowers, and the warmest wishes.
i hope you guys have a true living experience this weekend because you deserve it. you are breathing. you are living. you are a wonderful creature of God. take advantage of such a gift and live.
xxoxox.
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