will i am.

This past semester was officially the most difficult yet. Not only did I have to meet transfer deadlines, but I also came across one of the toughest teachers (don't believe me? Check out his rating: ratemyprofessors) in one of my most challenging courses: writing. Many of my friends find it surprising when I tell them how difficult writing is for me, but clearly there is a difference between writing in a journal and writing for academia. Friends - this may sound silly, but do you have any idea how sad I was to know that my straight A streak would be over? After receiving B's on my first two papers, my heart sunk. I felt very defeated. But still, I took every advantage I could to seek help from my professor, the writing center, and that writer of a boyfriend of mine. I spent many days in hiding, working my eyes and fingers to the core to give everything I had in the 20 page paper that was the final. When I turned it in last week, a feeling of relief overcame me and as the days went on, I became more accepting of that inevitable "B". I kept telling myself, "You can't win 'em all."

Last night came the moment of truth when I received an e-mail telling me that my grade had been posted. I took a deep breath, sat at my computer, and logged in... cautiously clicking my way through the site to check my grade. I could hardly believe it. In fact, I think I blinked a few times. But yes, there it was... an A in Writing 2. I could feel a smile slowly starting to form on my face. Finally, a feeling of joy and excitement came over me as I ran into z's arms. I looked up at his confused expression and couldn't help but smile bigger. I told him the good news. He smiled back, congratulated me, telling me he had faith the whole time. 

My streak continues on. It is an accomplishment that I am so proud of because it's a testament of my will. In one of my personal statements to the university, I talked about this (by the way, the UC rep who read a draft of my personal statements was so impressed that she asked if she could make copies of it as examples!). About my will power and how it has grown stronger since that day I quit smoking cigarettes. Since then, I have gone back to school and despite my past of  habitually dropping out, I've continued going while maintaining a 4.0 GPA. For the past 9 months, I have gone to the gym everyday (with a few exceptions) to better my health and managed to lose 25-30 pounds in the process. All the while, I am continuing to learn more about who I am and what I am capable of. Yes, it can get very frustrating along the way and there are times when I feel like taking the easier route, but reality hits me and I know that life has no shortcuts. I have come a long way and still have a ways to go... but 2011 has been a good year. If things work out accordingly [more on that later], I am hoping to have an even better new year. Please cross your fingers for me.