bittersweet haiku.

spring break ends today,

spring will arrive on sunday,

bittersweet it is.
--

stop to smell the flowers this weekend.

ooooxx

thoughts and prayers.

i went to sleep feeling guilty last night. to think that i was safe and had a bed to sleep in while the people in Japan were being swept by the tsunami.... didn't seem right. when i woke up and still saw that i had everything i had the day before and that for us, life would go on as normal, i felt compelled to pray. i prayed for the people in Japan, i prayed for the safety of those in Hawaii and surrounding islands, and i prayed a thanks for all that i have.

let's continue sending prayers and thoughts this weekend.

let it snow.

here are more of the many, many pictures i had taken. photos seriously do not do the snow any justice - it's so majestic when you're in its presence. i used to be jealous of summer babies because unlike february, which its known for its rainy days, they have the ideal weather for beach parties, pool parties, or even a backyard bbq party. i always wanted to have a birthday party on the beach, celebrating around a bonfire and singing happy drunken tunes. but now that i've experienced a birthday in the snow, i've grown an appreciation for my winter birth. it brought back fond memories of my early childhood days in korea and of my grandmother who used to layer me in winter clothes until i could barely move my limbs. i'm looking forward to celebrating many more white birthdays.

xoxo

bday finale.

i am back from my winter wonderland of a birthday - 3 nights and 2.5 days of snow. the beauty!

the trip mostly consisted of snowboarding, eating, and sleeping - a schedule that i wasn't too crazy about but dealt with for the sake of enjoying the snow. if i may, can i insert a thing or two about snowboarding? i knew snowboarding would be weary on my body but had no idea the toll it would take. it didn't help that the people who joined me on the trip live and breathe the sport and thus, scheduled their days accordingly. however, for someone who hasn't the knack or the heart for it - it became incredibly frustrating. i took 3 lessons in total, the first of which z and i took together. as z advanced, i grew more irritated and impatient. z eventually asked in his own frustration, "so you're just going to give up??" i wanted to scream that this was not my idea of a great time and that i hadn't envisioned my trip up to the snowy mountains to be so demanding and that.. hello? i wasn't trying to be a professional snowboarder! i had intended on it being fun and enjoyable. as the days went on, i discovered people all around me who shared the same sentiment: frustrated parents scolding their crying children and boyfriends yelling at their annoyed girlfriends. eventually i was able to find the humor in it all.

the second day wasn't as bad as the first in that i left my group of friends after the lesson to do what i had gone to big bear to do: enjoy the snow the way i wanted to. i went up the lift a few times and eventually big snowflakes fell from the sky. i forgot to mention that when it started snowing the first day i was very excited and shared my excitement with my equally excited instructor. the second day it snowed, i was by myself so when i fell on my ass for the umpteenth time, i just laid there and caught those big snowflakes with my tongue. i wasn't pressured to get back up and i didn't have to worry about falling behind on my lesson. i just simply laid there and stared up at the sky and thought to myself: thank you God for this wonderful birthday gift. once, i turned to a person who fell beside me and with a big smile exclaimed, "it's snowing!" to which he responded with a neutral, "yeah" as he got up and made his way back down the slope.

i was hoping to explore other areas of big bear aside from the resort and the cabin but it never happened. we woke up early, went to the resorts, then came back to the cabin to sleep. i would have even liked to have spent more time at the cabin, snuggled up by the fireplace with hot cocoa and a good book. even though i managed to build my snowman on the last day, it was rushed and on our way out. wouldn't it have been a wonder to build many snowmen and make a thousand of snow angels and go sledding down a big white hill? these are all things i'll definitely have to make sure i do next time. in the meanwhile, my body is in serious need of healing and rest because it isn't 26 anymore.

happy birthday to me.

xoxox

pt. 3

i had been meaning to visit the huntington library but never could find the time to make the 1.5 trip there. z had never gone and so i thought nothing would be grander than spending my birthday there and i was so right. the weather was warm, the flowers were in full bloom, and the beautiful colors vibrated as to wish me a happy birthday.

i invited my friend jess and her boyfriend, paul and they arrived bearing gifts! i am so in love with the owl "quirkeys" key covers and as jess pointed out, i can hand them out to my friends as well! she also gave me a super cute owl oven mit - i'm figuring at this rate, my owl collection will be complete in no time.

we ended the night in old town pasadena enjoying good food and drinks. my birthday isn't until tomorrow but the birthday love has been all around me. i love it.

xo.

greetings.

i didn't tell you guys but z has been away for a few days on business, which means i've been keeping busy with additional emi duties. needless to say, i am extra happy and relieved that he is returning home tonight and i'm sure emi will be just as excited to greet him.

the creature above will also be home to greet z when he returns. i caught that little guy before emi did. z says that the chinese consider them as good luck and i figured having a little luck on our side wouldn't hurt.

changes are happening.

some years back, i entered into an embarassingly heated argument with a canadian about season changes in California. he insisted that all was sunny here and even in the winter, it didn't drop below 70 degrees. i could see where he was coming from because it's true, our seasons aren't dramatic (not in so cal anyway), but they still very much exist. even now, signs of Fall are starting to appear - from the color changes in the leaves to the shedding of plant life all around.

for those not in the know, Fall is my ultimate favorite holiday. i love the beautiful reds, oranges, and yellows - i can even smell Fall in the air. i love carving pumpkins for halloween, i love pumpkin pie, i love thanksgiving and being lazy with family after feasting... i love the feeling of love this season brings. all that with the scarves, beanies, jackets, and boots to accommodate the gray skies... i live for it.

z and i stayed up in bed last night, chatting about change. actually, it was more like me confessing my fears about the changes that are headed our way in the next couple of years and him assuring me it would be okay. change, for me, is a frightening thing. i can't help but feel like i'm being swallowed by an overwhelming wave. i'm certain it's a control thing and i'm trying to overcome it and embrace change as the inevitable hap it is.. but it takes a lot of internal preparation. we talked until i was reassured enough to fall asleep.

i'm sure the fear will creep up again but with my favorite season just right around the corner, i'm hoping that i'll be reminded to be thankful for all the joy that surrounds me in the present.. and to bask in it while it's here, under my nose.

happy friday, everyone. have a joyful and blessed weekend, xxxoo.

flower girl.

i am so madly in love with this photo. it was taken during our afternoon walk yesterday - i was initially having a one-on-one photo session with the flower but emi decided to come along and give it a good sniff. it was a kodak moment.

it looks like our girl is beginning to appreciate nature :)

"If nothing ever changed, there'd be no butterflies."

z came rushing into the apartment this morning, urging me to come downstairs to meet our little visitor. i followed him to the hedges and there sat this beautiful creature. we stared at it in awe for a few seconds, then i quietly snuck away to get my camera. what a nice gift from God this sunday morning.

speaking of sundays, mine evolve around house chores, studying/reading/homework, and grocery shopping for the week. today is no exception. in fact, my school work appears to be overwhelming already as i sit at my desk stacked with binders and ridiculous amounts of reading material. but however overpowered i may feel, i believe the butterfly came to remind me that in the end of all this change and hard work, something beautiful will come out of it. just like a butterfly.

exhaling.

on nights that i don't have school, z attends his jiu-jitsu classes. i secretly enjoy these evenings because i get to take things slow. i take emi out for walks, cook dinner with my music playing in the background and enjoy the sunset with a glass of wine (or beer, depending on my mood). i can look out into the sky and actually process my thoughts, unwind from work, and take the time to say, "thank you, thank you, thank you".

it feels good.

blooms.

something about raindrops makes my heart happy. i find them at their best when they're hanging out on a leaf or fighting for room on a flower petal. these pictures were taken during our afternoon walk yesterday around our complex. the management team does a great job at keeping up with the landscaping and really, it's one of my favorite things about where i live - all the beautiful vegetation! emi, on the other hand, wasn't too happy about me stopping here and there to take pictures of these colorful gifts. she kept looking back at me as if to say, "wouldja hurry up already?" she doesn't know how to appreciate nature yet.

yellow vs purple

purple orchids were always my favorite,

until i witness'd this yellow beauty:



which do you prefer?
i'm stuck.